Perfi (orientation)
| Orientation: | Any |
|---|---|
| Prefix: | Perfi |
| Main Umbrella: | Miscellaneous Orientation |
| Attracted To: | Individuals or genders perceived as perfect |
|---|
Perfi is an orientation prefix for individuals that are only (or almost only) attracted to individuals or genders they deem perfect, the prefix 'perfi' deriving from the English word 'perfect'.[1][2]
As perfection is subjective, there is no exact model of what a perfect individual looks like, and thus this attraction differs for every individual. Perfi orientations are often caused by relationship based trauma, social anxiety, or socially-impacting neurodivergence, but can be caused by a myriad of reasons.
Perfi orientations are closely associated with thought/fiction based orientations, such as ficto-, somni-, image-, cogitari-, OC-, and ide-. Perfi orientations can have an attached prefix to denote that an individual has a perceived perfect gender of attraction, such as perfimascsexual, meaning only masculine individuals are perceived as perfect.
Perfi individuals can sometimes appear as fussy or picky, but as with any orientation, this attraction cannot be forcefully changed. It is common for individuals that strive for perfection or a soulmate to be recommended that they socialise more, either by friends, family, or therapists, but doing so does not change one's ability to feel attraction.[3] These individuals can often experience loneliness, and a desire to want relationships, yet at the same time not want to have a relationship with those around them. There are many reasons as to why one may identify as perfi. Some similar experiences include:
- Fearing rejection or betrayal from others,
- Having great difficulty trusting or relying on others due to anxiety,[4]
- Fearing harm from others due to past experiences and thus feeling more comfortable with individuals that cannot possibly harm them,[5]
- Fearing a lack of control and thus feeling more comfortable within one's own thought created scenarios,
- Being solely attracted to psychological or physical traits that are not possible in humans,
- Having higher standards due to maturity and an oversaturation of experiences and previous relationships that did not meet one's original standards,[6]
- Feeling that the flaws of others are not worth the effort in handling.[6]
- Feeling attraction to those one's recently met and, having only seen positive traits, perceives them as initially perfect, of which said attraction fades when one realises the other's flaws.
Due to human nature, perfi individuals are seldom attracted to real/factual individuals but can be if they happen to meet someone that matches their criteria of perfection. The perfi orientation was not created as a method to judge others and their flaws, nor as a notion for others to strive for perfection. It was created for the perceiver alone to describe one's struggle with real relationships because of a neurological injury or difference, an attraction that is only felt when wholly comfortable and trusting of another.
History
Perfi was coined by Jeb_CC on the 17th of July, 2023, via xir carrd.[2]
Related Terms
| Label | Relationship | Description | Difference |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cogitari | Similar | Attraction only experienced within one's own head. | Perfi individuals can experience external sources of attraction. |
| Ficto | Similar | Attraction to fictional characters. | Ficto attraction does not include the attraction to perfection. Perfi individuals can also very rarely experience attraction to real individuals. |
| Image | Similar | Having attraction but not wishing to ever enact on it outside of one's own thoughts. | Perfi individuals can act on one's attraction, but the source of attraction may only be in one's thoughts. |
| Ide | Similar | Attraction is based on one's idea of an individual and not their gender. | Ide attraction does not include the attraction to perfection. |
| OC | Similar | Attraction to original characters. | Perfi individuals can experience attraction to any fictional character regardless of how they were created. |
| Somni | Similar | Attraction that changes or is influenced by one's sleep or dreams. | Perfi orientations persist outside of one's dreams (but may only be satisfied inside one's dreams). |
Orientations
| Label | Orientation | Flag | Creator(s) |
|---|---|---|---|
| Perfiplatonic | Platonic | N/A | Jeb_CC |
| Perfiromantic | Romantic | N/A | Jeb_CC |
| Perfisexual | Sexual | N/A | Jeb_CC |
Flags and Symbols
The perfi flag was created by Jeb_CC on the 17th of July, via xir carrd. The flag composes of white, purples, and blues. The white represents truth and perfection, the purple represents dreams and thoughts, and the blue represents trust and stability.[2]
Resources
- ↑ "perfect". Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/perfect. Accessed on 17 Jul, 2023.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 "Perfi-". Jeb_CC, https://jebcc.carrd.co/#terms:~:text=COINED%20TERMS-,Perfi%2D,-After%20some%20recent. Accessed on 17 July, 2023.
- ↑ Bonior, Dr. Andrea. "My friends and family think I’m too picky when it comes to romantic partners". Washington Post, 11 Feb, 2015, https://www.washingtonpost.com/express/wp/2015/02/11/my-friends-and-family-think-im-too-picky-when-it-comes-to-romantic-partners/.
- ↑ McDermott, Nicole. "Commitment Issues: What You Need To Know, According To Experts". Forbes Health, 26 Apr, 2023, https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/commitment-issues/.
- ↑ luckyluckyy__. "I (32F) know I am too picky in dating, but it's because of my violent/traumatic romantic history". Reddit, 2021, https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/qxuoyc/i_32f_know_i_am_too_picky_in_dating_but_its/.
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 pmoriarty. "Loneliness Is a Warning Sign to Be Social". Hacker News, 22 Aug, 2016, https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=12339406.
